People often ask me how I remain so seemingly constantly happy…perhaps they think I am blessed with a problem free existance that is never clouded by heartbreak or sadness. That isn’t true..I am certainly blessed with so many wonderful things and people in my life, but things can and do go wrong in my world.
I choose not to allow those experiences to interfere too deeply with my mindset though and with practice, it has become a constant habit that is easier to manage and maintain…
Remaining positive is easy when all is well in our worlds but how can we remain positive when we are appearing to be watching our dreams fade?
Meditation can help with this in many ways… firstly, once you get into the habit of regular relaxation and meditation; calming down your ego and your conscious awareness on a daily or regular basis, we find it much easier to remain in control of our thoughts and emotions when things aren’t going the way that we perceive that they should.
Any event, in isolation, does not have any meaning at all until YOU attach an emotion to it. You have the choice to accept that something that you had planned for has not been achieved and you have the choice to think either positively or negatively about that situation because you are in control of your own thoughts and therefore to a very large degree, in control of your own life.
Getting into a habit of putting a “positive spin” on negative situations that arise lead to a healthier, happier frame of mind.
Let’s take an example of someone who is aiming to lose weight… this is an easy example for me to draw upon as, as a hypnotherapist, the vast majority of my clients are working towards this.
They achieve an amazing weight loss in the first few months but then begin to feel “stuck…” what they perceive to be negative situations are threatening to lead them back into the comfort eating they have battled for so long and they put a couple of pounds back on and think that’s it! I have failed again and as well as the negative situation that I believe is causing me to over eat again, I now give myself permission to eat whatever I like, put the weight back on again and then feel bad some more!
This is an opportunity to put on a positive spin and FORCE their thoughts into a different direction… and it could look something like this…
- I am SO proud of how far I have come and what I have achieved in such a short space of time
- I am already 3 clothes sizes smaller than I was just a few months ago and when I bought those new clothes, it felt amazing to really feel that I am heading towards my goal
- I know I can achieve this and I am so excited about how it is going to feel for me when I hit my target weight
- I have enjoyed a lot of the lovely healthy meals I have started to cook for myself
- It feels freeing to me not to HAVE to turn to food when I need to feel better.. I could start thinking of other things that will lift my mood in a more natural, lasting way…. This beautiful weather means I can get out for a lovely walk and perhaps on my way home I can pick up my favourite magazine which might have ideas for the kinds of clothes I might like to buy when I lose my next few pounds
- It makes me feel good to know I have the support of my family around me
- I did overeat yesterday, but today, this moment even, is the chance for me to begin again and really build up the excited feelings of achieving this goal
- I am pleased this has happened as I now feel more certain that ever that achieving this goal is something I desperately want
And so on…when you start to force your thoughts into a more positive direction, your mind will automatically begin to look for other thoughts which have a similar vibration/feeling attached to them so it only takes a few minutes of “focused thinking” to begin to feel much better and lift your vibration. And you can apply this to absolutely any situation that you might encounter. It only ever becomes something negative when you allow your thoughts to run loose and free without exercising any control over them.
Using meditation is even better as it works to really “shut out” that mind chatter which causes us to feel stressed and can even lead to a manifestation of physical illness in the body.
A Meditation technique for positive thinking in any situation.
- Sit comfortably and breathe deeply
- Close your eyes and keep focused on the breath
- As you breathe in, imagine that you are breathing in relaxation, calm and peace
- And as you exhale just imagine any stress, worries or concerns leaving the body
- Notice where in your body you are feeling any tension or tightness
- Then picture yourself at the top of a huge flight of stairs; be creative and build up a picture of this stair case in your mind
- Try to observe yourself very slowly descending this staircase, and with every step down that you take, just say to yourself “I allow my body and my mind to go deeper and deeper into a relaxed state with every step.”
- Don’t force the relaxation, just ALLOW it
- When you feel more relaxed and comfortable picture yourself walking along a path, you can set the scene in your mind and you should allow your mind to be as creative as it likes… try to make the scene special to you and most of all peaceful, perhaps a path in woods with beautiful views ahead or even walking along a beach… whatever feels good to you is always right with relaxation
- Stop and look behind you and notice how far you have come in your life and what you have achieved thus far and let yourself feel really proud of any obstacles you encountered along the way
- Then fix your gaze ahead now, at where you WANT to be, where you ARE heading and let your mind focus on that and how good that feels for a few moments before bringing your awareness back to the body and gently letting yourself come back to awareness
Notice how much better you feel and how with regular practice you can learn to control your internal environment in even the most stressful periods of life.
Silver Daisies Meditation classes are held on a regular basis at the Leaf Centre in St Helens. I also offer one to one Meditation coaching as a more focused and tailored form of tuition.
Tel: 07889 069545